victoria

victoria wrote (edited )

Ive been having the exact same thoughts but in the other direction, often i think id prefer to be known by a more normal name, like my middle name. I guess i can just do that, since plenty of people go by their middle names, but it does feel kind of confusing like idk if i made a mistake or if this is just internalized social pressure, or if its just a manifestation of my general self dislike that’ll fade with time, idk. Anyway it is the name i use on here so i guess for now i can keep using it

It is also a big stupid thorn in my side that my name is generally read as exclusively male in Europe and i keep getting misgendered in written communication, like when i email my gp. Though that might just be intentional misgendering from my experiences there

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victoria wrote

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victoria OP wrote (edited )

Its really fucking sad that they just give you stuff that makes you sleepy if you have anxiety or mania or if youre a kid with autism thats fidgety or hard to manage. Its kind of funny in a bad way. Like. Its not solving the problem its just fucking tranquilizing myself,because im too difficult to deal with. They call them "antipsychotics" but really they just shut you down completely.I dont think thats really a proper name. I guess i kind of had to take it because i was starting to get really fuicking fidgety and stuck in thoughts of hurting myself because of horrible memories and thoughts, but i couldnt even get uip the next day. What the fuck

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