Heads up! Champion radish hits the window next to you, startling the crap out if you but bouncing off harmlessly.

Putting you in the stocks and letting all the villagers grab a handful of spoiled radishes left over from the previous winter and toss them wetly them at you.

OK I'll meet him BUT he has to promise to keep the machine turned off

OK well I won't pelt you then but I know exactly what kind I'd use, in my head.

Malaga violet incoming!

Dozens and dozens of watermelon radishes relentlessly being hurled in your direction all day until midnight

A high velocity Diakon comes flying at you at high speeds, obliterating you both.

Sounds like you're a person who knows exactly what they'd like to be pelted with, that's admirable!

A Misato Rose comes flying at your face, as the sweet, non spicy radish is hurled toward you from across the room

dislexically misread this as "poops doesn't work on my machine"

https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2023/03/unkillable-uefi-malware-bypassing-secure-boot-enabled-by-unpatchable-windows-flaw/

I hopped on Duolingo for a way to brush up on Spanish but all the questions are easy. I'm told i can just keep skipping ahead beyond where it puts you automatically, but I took their level assessment quiz to place me and I got no questions wrong at all.

I think they might be good for "I know three sentences of XYZ language or less, and want to be able to read a newspaper article" or something, but I don't know how much the format can help someone whose level is at "I can pretty much hold a conversation with a native speaker, if they're patient and understanding."