there are definitely imposters! That's definitely a thing!

A majority of people drop out or are kicked out of their PhD! Plenty of us have worked with or observed people who don't belong in the position they hold! We all want to be in an effective position where we are challenged but productive!!

Especially regarding PhDs, I don't want professors, the literal best of the best of the best in their subject area, who suddenly forget the very basics of Bayesian reasoning to tell me "Ah, that is just the Imposter Syndrome" because no it isn't!

I'm a skilled person who is trying to be the best of the best in my subject area but I am underperforming. I've been me for 23 fuckin years! I'm good at stuff and I'm well acquainted with what it feels like to be challenged. But here, on this project, I need either 1. guidance or 2. to be put somewhere or on something else!

What I don't need is for you reach into your Neat Little Answers Bin with your canned "I Can't Believe It's Not Empathy!" response shared by a bunch of Really Smart Academindustria Folks and then tell me "Ah, student, I also felt this way before, it's called the IMPOSTER SYNDROME, and it basically means not to worry."

Who gives a care if you felt that way! You, hypothetical amalgamation of Professors I've talked to, you exist from the experiences of PhD students conditioned on those who became professors! I'm the unconditional PhD student and I'm more likely than not to drop out or to be kicked out! Let me express it for you!

$$P(can do it | is a phd student) < 1 $$
$$P(can do it | was a phd student, graduated, and became a full-ass professor) = 1 - \epsilon$$
as $\epsilon$ approaches $\infty$

I have numbers! I can show you that I am underperforming versus my peers and expectations! I have feelings! The feelings I'm feeling now preceded moments in my life where I have irrevocably failed or underperformed my way out of a friend group, out of an academic setting, out from a collaborative project!

Claiming someone is suffering from the Imposter Syndrome should come from an informed, empathetic place and should only be said with caution and certainty. It shouldn't be applied liberally to all concerns and insecurities, because anybody with a wink of think will see through that thin bandaid!

thank u for coming to my ted talk